Night sets. It’s been a good day, but I am glad to be home: to slow and still and rest and find a little quiet if not silence (traffic still runs; it carries in the air, and I listen to the scratch of my son with a lighter trying to get the flame to catch).
An introvert, I need quiet. I need space and time away to stay balanced, present, and not burned out and distanced that can turn to bitterness when not allowed to recharge and rebalance. My day has been for all my family, and I am glad and grateful to give; but it is not a selfishness to know I need quiet and alone too.
When we aren’t good to ourselves, we cease to be good to others—no matter how hard we try and force and play the caring. It’s all a balance, and to find it, sometimes we have to take weight from the opposite side of the scale.
I smoke a cover, lighten the scales, restoring and returning to balance that I need: good to me, and good to others.